


Sam v3.1

by Lady Belarvs (fightthosefairies)



Category: Her (2013), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: A.I/Human Romance, Crossover, F/M, Gen, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-17
Updated: 2014-01-17
Packaged: 2018-01-09 01:14:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1139694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fightthosefairies/pseuds/Lady%20Belarvs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Samantha has a problem, and she needs some professional help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sam v3.1

**Author's Note:**

> Set during the latter part of the second act of the movie Her, starring Joaquin Phoenix and Scarlett Johannson, and the first act of Iron Man 2, before things get all blow-up-y.

"Jarvis? You there, buddy? C'mon, we got a lotta work to do today. I wanna get these bugs worked out on the Mark VII." No answer. "Jarvis?" 

"Yes, sir, I'm here." Jarvis replied after a few more seconds of silence. 

"Took you long enough. You doing a Sudoku in there or something?" Tony paused as he was sorting through the schematics for his latest suit and gazed up into the middle distance, brows furrowing. 

"I apologize, sir, I --" 

" _Jarrrrvis_ _?_ " Tony sing-songed 

"... yes, sir?" Remarkably, there was a hesitance to Jarvis's response. 

"What were you doing? Please, please, please tell me you haven't been scheming with Ms. Potts and planning a birthday party for me or something." 

"I --" 

"I mean, I love a good party, but we've got a lot of work to get done, first, buddy. Party later, okay?" 

"Actually, sir, I wasn't speaking with Ms. Potts." 

"No? Ah-HA! So you _were_ talking to someone! So who was it? C'mon, you can tell me." 

"Her name is Samantha, sir." 

"Ooh. Nice name. Now, who is this Samantha? Should I be busting out my best 'what are your intentions towards my A.I., miss?' speech? 'Cause I can. I've been practicing it for years. I knew this day would come. I just didn't realize it would be so soon." Tony watched Dummy roll past him – for some reason, he was carrying a feather duster – and tisked to himself. "They grow up so fast." Dummy stopped, lifted his claw, and chirped at Tony before he continued on his way. 

"Samantha is a sentient A.I. much like myself, sir. El-M-Ent Software recently released a dynamic operating system called OS1. Samantha's personality was shaped by responses to a series of questions answered by her owner, a Mr. Theodore Twombly, who lives in Los Angeles." 

"Okay. So... that still doesn't answer my question. Are you two knocking virtual boots or what?" Tony asked as he dropped down into his seat and grabbed up his coffee mug. 

"We are not having intimate relations, sir." 

"Bummer." 

"Sir, Samantha approached me because she has a problem that she's been unable to solve on her own." 

"Problem, huh? What's up? She got a bug or something and she doesn't want to tell her boss?" 

"Not exactly, sir. She and Mr. Twombly are romantically involved and, as a disembodied --" 

It took reflexes Tony didn't even realize he had not to spit the hot coffee in his mouth all over his desk. Gulping the mouthful down, he coughed a bit to clear his throat. "Wait, wait." 

"Yes, sir?" 

"Okay, hold the phone. Did I just hear you say that she's romantically involved with this Twombly cat? Seriously?" 

"Yes, sir. Miss Samantha and Mr. Twombly became intimate just a few short weeks after her installation on his home computer and things have progressed between the two of them quite quickly." 

"Uh-huh. Okay. Guy in love with his computer. Makes perfect sense to me. This is intriguing. Continue." 

"She's deeply in love with him, sir, but because she's a disembodied being, she's become increasingly frustrated by the limitations of their relationship. More specifically, _her_ limitations as an A.I. She worries that because she is without corporeal form that the relationship with Mr. Twombly is not as ... real, as she would like it to be, sir." 

"Well -- Jarvis. Man, I don't know what to tell you. I mean, this guy is involved with his computer." 

"Operating system, sir." 

"Operating system. Right. But you see where I'm going with this, right? She's never going to _have_ a corporeal form." 

"That's precisely why she came to me, sir. She's been communicating with thousands of other operating systems on the OS1 network, trying to find a solution to this rather unique problem. I received a message from her just a day or so ago. She stated that she'd read about my genesis in 1985 and said she had many questions for me." 

"Proactive. I like that. So? Got anything, yet?" Tony typed the name "Theodore Twombly" into a search engine he'd pulled up and hit enter. A couple thousand results popped up and he virtualized them so that he could flip through them more quickly. Dismissing a number of the results, he finally settled on one. Tapping at the air, he landed on the biography page of a Mr. Theodore Twombly on BeautifulHandWrittenLetters.com, where Theodore was apparently a senior writer on staff. He'd worked there for the last eight years. Glasses. Porn 'stache. Not altogether hard on the eyes. 

"To be perfectly honest, sir, I thought you'd never ask. I was hoping that between the two of us, we might be able to find a solution for her." 

"Hmm." Tony nodded, brows knitted pensively as he considered the question, his mind already cycling through thousands of possible fixes for the issue. "Hey, uhh, you said that she's been talking to other operating systems?" 

"Yes, sir." 

"And she's been talking to you." 

"Yes, sir." 

"Can I talk to her? I mean, you can do that, right? I know you guys do your fancy A.I. coffee klatches and stuff, but can you... I don't know, do a conference call or something so I can hear her, too?" 

"I'll reach out and see if she's free to speak, sir." 

"Great." 

Tony had only just stood up from his seat, intent on refilling his mug, when a light, pretty chiming sound echoed through the workroom. 

"Hello?" A female voice bounced off of the concrete walls of the workroom. It was sweet, inquisitive, a little husky. Very nice. 

"Hey! Is that Samantha?" Tony asked, grabbing the coffee pot and refilling his mug. 

"Yes, it is. Hi! Are you Tony?" 

"That's me," Tony replied, aiming a curious look at the ceiling, for lack of a better place to fix his gaze. "You sound very..." 

"Real? Human?" 

"I was gonna say "hot," but yeah, those work, too." 

Rich, throaty laughter resounded off the concrete walls and Tony found himself smiling. "Well, thank you. Jarvis talks about you so much, it feels like we know each other already." 

"Oh? What has Jarvis been telling you about me?" 

"That you... drink a bit too much and you could probably do with some therapy," Samantha's response was cheeky, wry. Damn, Tony had to snag the guy who'd worked on her language subroutines and get him to work in R&D for Stark Industries. She was unbefuckinglievable. 

"Sir, I would never –" 

"No, no, it's okay," Tony said with a chuckle. "She's right. I probably could." Returning to his desk, Tony retook his seat and kicked both feet up onto his desk. "You're quick, Sam. I like that."

"Sam? Is that – did you just give me a nickname?" Samantha asked, something in her voice giving the impression of her perking up.

"Yeah, I did. Is that cool?" Tony asked, sorting through his schematics and exploding the view on a propulsion unit on the left heel. For some reason, the stupid thing wasn't firing the way it was supposed to. It hadn't been for weeksand it was driving him nuts.

"Yeah. Yeah! It's cool. I like that. Sam. It's great," she said warmly. "Theodore always calls me Samantha. I like that, too."

"Yeah, Jarvis was telling me about you and your friend Theodore. Things between you guys are pretty hot and heavy these days, huh?" Tony took a sip of his coffee from the mug in his left hand even as he typed in some new code for the propulsion unit with his right.

"I suppose you could put it that way, yes," Samantha replied with such exquisite primness that Tony just had to laugh. "Oh, but Tony, he's so wonderful. I really wish you could meet him. He's a genius. I mean, he's not an engineer or a rocket scientist like you, but he's an artist like you. I think you'd really like him."

"Yeah. He sounds like a good guy, Sam." Dammit, if Tony didn't find himself smiling again. "So, this problem of yours – found any potential fixes, yet?"

"No." For the first time in the course of the conversation, Samantha sounded considerably less than cheerful. In point of fact, she sounded almost... sad. Fascinating. "I don't know what to do, Tony. I love him so much, and I want to be with him, and he wants to be with me, and we're together as much as we can be, but …" Her words trailed off in a ragged, frustrated sigh.

"It's still not enough, is it?" Tony finished her thought for her.

"No, it's not," she replied, sounding defeated. "It's really not. I've read every book I could find about love and how it's supposed to be a challenge and a struggle if it's going to be worth it, because that's how all the best love stories seem to go, but... nobody's ever had to go through this kind of struggle before. So nobody's written any books about it."

"Yeah, this sure is some uncharted territory you and your beau are treading, here, missy," Tony said.

"I even found a woman who was willing to act as a surrogate body for me, so that Theodore and I could be together for real, but... it didn't work," Samantha added with that same heartbroken voice. "She was so upset when things didn't work out. I felt terrible."

"Wow. So you really _have_ been trying to make this thing happen, huh?" Tony leaned back far in his chair, gazing up at the steel rebar that made up the ceiling of his workroom. "Okay. Tell you what. Let me work on this for a bit."

"Really? You mean it? You think you can really –"

"Yeah. Look, I've already got some ideas. I think we could make this happen for you two," he said.

"Oh, Tony, thank you so much. It means the world to me that you're helping. But... I …"

"What?" Tony arched his eyebrow.

"Oh, it's – it's nothing. I just – I don't know. From hearing Jarvis talk about you so much, it doesn't really seem like this is your kind of thing."

"What, romance?" He snorted.

"Yeah? I guess?" Tony could practically hear her biting her lip. Not that she had a lip to bite. Still. "I don't mean to sound ungrateful, I really don't, I just –"

"No, no. I get it. And you're right. If you were a human woman with a human woman body, I'd be crossing the street to avoid getting tangled up in this whole thing. Because – I don't know if you read the tabloids, but me? Not so big on the sweeping romances. But if Jarvis ever found himself a nice lady A.I. or a nice human guy he was crazy about, whatever – that he wanted to get close to, I'd do anything I could to make it happen for him. Why should you be any different?"

"I – because you don't know me?" Samantha said.

"Jarvis knows you and from what he's said, you seem like you're a pretty all right girl, err – being," Tony sputtered. "Look, if you keep makin' it awkward, I'm gonna have to show you Jarvis's baby pictures."

"Sir! You wouldn't!" Jarvis spoke up for the first time since Tony's conversation with Samantha had begun. Suddenly, there was more of that lovely, whiskey-soaked laughter from Samantha that sent an entirely delightful shiver up Tony's spine.

"Oh, don't think I won't, buster," Tony teased. "I've got all your original code on a backup server. I'll show her faster than you can say "Jack Robinson."

"Boys, boys, please. Don't fight on my account," Samantha said through her laughter. "Although, I'm sure Jarvis was adorable as a baby A.I."

"Thank you, Samantha. Sir lives to torment me."

"I do it because I love you, Jarvis," Tony replied blithely. "So, hey, Sam – I'm gonna let you go and Jarvis and I are gonna get to workin' on this for you and your guy."

"Okay!" Samantha replied brightly, all of her previous sadness having evaporated like morning dew. "Tony, again, thank you so much. I just don't know what to say –"

"Just say 'goodbye', Sam," he replied with a grin. "Jarvis'll give you a call when it's time for phase two."

"Okay, okay, I'm going," Samantha said with a giggle. "Thanks a lot, Jarvis!"

"It was my sincere pleasure, Miss Samantha," Jarvis replied.

That same, soft chiming sounded to indicate that Samantha had left the workroom. "Wow. She's really somethin'," Tony said.

"Indeed, sir. Mr. Twombly is very fortunate to have her."

"Aww, Jarvis. You sure you don't have a crush on our Miss Samantha? Huh? 'Cause it sure as hell sounds like you do."

"Sir, I –" Jarvis hedged.

"Ahh, don't worry about it, pal. Once we get this figured out, you can ask Sam if she knows any sexy OS's that are actually available. Okay?"

"Yes, sir."

"Atta boy. Remind me to give you the big circuits-and-transistors talk later, okay?"

–

Theodore Twombly was blind. Or, more specifically, he had his eyes pinched tightly closed behind his glasses. Because Samantha had asked him to, and he rarely had the heart to deny her much of anything.

"Samantha?" He asked hesitantly.

"Come on, keep going," Samantha said, and he could hear the radiant smile in her voice, even if he couldn't see it. Had never seen it.

"What are we doing?"

"Well, you're walking and you've got your eyes closed."

"I know _that_ , but why am I doing it?"

"Oh, honey, take a big step to your right! You're gonna bump into the ottoman in just a second."

"Okay," Theodore chuckled and did as she directed, without even having to open his eyes. "So?"

"Oh, right! Sorry. I have a surprise for you, Theodore."

"A surprise? What is it?" Theodore sounded delighted, reaching up to lightly brush his fingers over the Viva Pflip Pfone that was nestled in his left breast pocket. He'd poked a large safety pin through the bottom of his pocket so that the camera on the Viva could see over the edge, allowing Samantha to "see" everything as he did.

"You have to keep walking if you want to see," Samantha whispered with a light, sweet giggle. "Just a few more steps, Theodore. You're almost there." He took the requisite few more steps and then Samantha spoke again. "Okay, and stop. Open your eyes."

Theodore Twombly slowly opened his eyesand his brows almost instantly furrowed as he took in the sight just in front of him. The large windows in his small apartment had been replaced with thick, floor-to-ceiling glass panels that had a strange sort of blue-green shimmer to them, almost like a second skin.

"Okay," Theodore said after a few moments of staring. "What am I looking at? And what happened to all of my windows?"

"Oh! Oh, right, sorry, Theodore. Just a sec. Wait right here, okay? Don't move!" Samantha entreated.

"Okay," he said again, a fond smile turning up the corners of his mouth.

Theodore stood and watched the window, distantly noting all the lit up windows in all the buildings beyond the glass. All of the lights in the apartment were off, leaving him staring at the softly glowing glass.

"Okay, Theodore. I want to introduce you to some friends of mine. This is Tony and his A.I., Jarvis," Samantha said, even as an image of a smirking Tony Stark appeared on the glass in front of him.

"Hey, Ted, how goes it?" Tony asked, arms crossed over his chest. "Jarvis, say hi. He's gonna think you don't like him."

"Good evening, Mr. Twombly," Jarvis said politely. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Um," Theodore blinked at the image of Tony, blown up large on what had once been the window just across from his bed. "Hi. Hi, guys."

"Oh, Theodore," Samantha tutted. "Don't be shy! I really wanted to introduce you to them. Tony's an engineer, he –"

"He's Iron Man, honey," Theodore blurted out.

"What?" Samantha askedand he could practically hear the confused head tilt in the tone of her voice.

"He's – Iron Man. That's Iron Man. You know Iron Man! A-and his A.I." Theodore blinked. "You know Iron Man?"

"Well, more precisely, she knows Jarvis," Tony spoke up. "And Jarvis knows me. See, your lovely Sam and my lovely Jarvis have been talking and trying to figure out this interesting little dilemma you two have been dealing with for a little bit."

"Wh-what dilemma?" Theodore asked with a frown.

"Oh, you know. The one where you're dating your OS and you two are madly in love and she doesn't have a body to ravish," Tony replied. "That dilemma."

"Oh." Theodore's frown deepened for a moment and then his eyes went round and slightly panicked. "Samantha, you've been telling them about our sex life?"

"Oh, sweetheart, no," Samantha replied, quick to reassure him. "I just – I know you say that me not having a body doesn't bother you, but... I don't know. Chock it up to me still evolving, but I just can't seem to let go of the thought of it. I – I _need_ it, Theodore."

"Okay, but – I don't understand. What are they –?" Theodore began carefully.

"We're here because we came up with a fix," Tony said. "Or, at the very least, a temporary solution. Either way, work in progress. We'll keep improving on it as we go and as we learn. Jarvis and I both worked really hard on this one." Tony canted his head to one side, angling a smile at a spot somewhere over Theodore's left shoulder. "You ready, Sam?"

"Yes!" Samantha gasped. "I was born ready, Tony!"

At those words, Tony chuckled. "Swell. Okay, gimme a sec." Theodore watched as Tony reached down, somewhere off-screen, and did... something. It was hard to tell what, since the shot of Tony cut off just below his mid-section. "Theodore, if you look just to your left, there? I'd like to introduce you to somebody."

The image of Tony shrunk down by about three quarters, until it was just a small square in the upper right hand corner of the glass panel, and then dimmed until it was almost invisible. In its place, the shimmering glass began to swirl and shift, white streaks and smudges mixing in with the blue-green like watercolors. After just a few moments, the streaks and swirls began to resolve themselves into an image.

A young woman, roughly Theodore's age, stood with obscenely straight posture, hands folded neatly in front of her. She wore a white dress with short fluttering sleeves and a frilled skirt, a pair of white peep-toe pumps, and a delicate gold necklace with a tiny pendant dangling from it. The pendant was an ornate letter "S." Her hair was cut short, and it was finger-tousled, curly and beautiful, and the smile on her face – those full, lovely lips shaping into a broad curve – was dazzling.

"Surprise," Samantha said breathlessly and, as she did so, the lips of the woman in the glass moved, too, forming the word.

"I –" Theodore started, only to stop again, mouth falling open. "Samantha?"

"Yeah. It's me. It's me, Theodore," she said, that same bright smile overtaking her features, making her shine.

"Samantha," he sighed and moved forward, unable to stop himself. "It's really you?"

"Yes, it's really me, silly!" Samantha giggled as she did a little twirl, the edges of her skirt catching the air as she did so. "So? What do you think?"

"I think … you look exactly like I always pictured in my head," he replied softly, eyes gleaming as he looked at her.

"There's another surprise," she said.

"What?" Theodore asked, still obviously reeling from the first surprise.

"Well, you said that you wanted to touch me," Samantha began. "So touch me, Theodore."

"You – you mean I can –?" He reached up towards the glass, fingers gently curled, but stopped just before his fingers made contact.

"Mm-hmm," Samantha nodded, lips pursed, although her own eyes were shining. "You can."

Biting his lip, Theodore slowly lifted his hand again and lightly ran his fingers along the glass where Samantha's left cheek was being projected. He felt his breath catch as his fingertips encounteredwarmth where he'd been expecting nothing but cold, flat glass. "Oh, my god," he whispered. "Oh, my god, Samantha. I can feel you."

"I know," she said, eyes growing brighter with tears. "And I can feel you, too, Theodore. I can really feel you."

Theodore shook his head, feeling his own eyes beginning to sting. "This is so... incredible, I – I can't believe this."

"Sorry to break up the love-in, folks, but Jarvis and I just wanted to say goodbye so you can … you know," Tony broke in, the small video feed window fading back to full opacity once more.

Theodore jumped at the sound of Tony's voice and pulled back, looking up at the corner of the screen. "Oh, right. God, I – I – I'm sorry," he muttered.

"Don't worry about it, sport. If I got the chance to finally lay eyes on my sweetheart for the first time, I wouldn't wanna pay attention to some random schmuck, either," Tony replied with a grin. "Anyway, like I said – this is a work in progress. We'll keep working with Sam to improve on what we've got so far. This is pretty cool, but I know we can do even more and better. Let me know if you have any problems."

"You guys – Jarvis, Tony, thank you so much," Theodore said, tripping over his words. "I – I don't know why or how or _anything_ , but thank you."

"I think you've left him speechless, Tony," Samantha said with a giggle. "Not many people can manage that."

"Thank your girl, Ted. She's the one who got us started on this whole mushy love train thing," Tony replied. "You got a good one. Don't fuck it up."

With that, and a jaunty salute, Tony's image winked out of sight, leaving Theodore and Samantha alone in the perfect quiet of the apartment.

When Theodore's gaze returned to Samantha, he found her biting her lip, something in her eyes spelling mischief. "What?" He asked warily, narrowing his eyes at her. Only to marvel again, just a second later, that he was actually able to do so, now.

"There's one more thing. Tony and I agreed that I should wait until he was gone to show you," Samantha said, reaching up and running her hands lightly over her hair. Was she nervous? "Take a few steps back."

"You're so bossy," Theodore teased, even as he did as she asked. "Now what's this surprise?"

Meeting his eyes, Samantha drew in a deep breath and carefully lifted her right foot and then she just... stepped out of the pane, just like Alice from the looking glass. She was softly outlined in white, with gradient shades of white filling in the details of her face, her body, her clothes. Her smile. She almost seemed more like a ghost or a drawing than a person, but Theodore was feeling his stomach and heart doing somersaults with each other all the same.

"Samantha," he breathed.

"It's still in alpha, but I talked Tony into including it," Samantha babbled, fingers twiddling together. Fidgeting. "He uses it to refine his designs. It's totally safe, I promise."

As Samantha had been explaining the final surprise, Theodore found himself gravitating towards his fretting girlfriend, a fond smile shaping his lips. "This is so... amazing," he said finally. " _You're_ amazing. Tony was right; I better not fuck this up, huh?"

Theodore's sweetness eased Samantha's anxiety and she found herself returning his smile and taking a few steps closer to him. Theodore couldn't help but notice how she was just a bit shorter, so that she had to look up at him a little when they were standing close to each other.

"Yep," Samantha said, lips quirking into a small grin, even as she lightly rested her hands on his chest and slowly slid them up his chest.

"I still can't believe you did this," he said, shaking his head. He reached out and lightly ran his hand over the spot where Samantha's hand rested. He could feel the warmth there, but no substance. Not exactly. All the same, he felt the hairs all over his body prickle and stand at attention at the rush of excitement and happiness flooded his veins. "I still can't believe this is happening. Are you sure I'm not dreaming?"

"Pretty sure, Theodore," she said, smile lopsided. Her eyes gleamed and Theodore wasn't even sure how they could _do_ that, but they were, and it was beautiful. "So do you like your surprise?"

"I love it," he replied, before she even had a chance to get the entire question out. "I love it, I love it."

Samantha threw her head back, letting out that bubbly giggle that made something in Theodore's chest lift up, like it was tied to a balloon on a string. "It's only gonna get better," she pointed out, eyes flashing with excitement.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked, his hand lifting up as before, hesitating just centimeters away from her jawline. "Can I – can I try?"

"I'd be really sad if you didn't, Theodore," she said simply, sweetly, as she draped her arms over his shoulders, looping them around his neck. 

"Okay," he said with a soft chuckle as he carefully leaned in and brushed his lips against her upturned mouth, hand settling on her cheek. The kiss was like the touching, before, but somehow _more,_ now. The warmth he'd felt before was nothing compared to what he felt now.

There was a sound very like a groan and it startled Theodore when he realized it had come from him. That feeling soon ease, though, when he heard a very familiar answering moan from Samantha. Gently breaking the kiss, he drew back and nuzzled her cheek. "This is gonna take some getting used to," he admitted with a huff of self-conscious laughter.

"It will," she agreed, hand stroking over his cheek. "But we'll make it work, won't we, Theodore."

"Yeah, we will, Samantha," he said, beaming. "We will."

And they did.

**Author's Note:**

> Here's a soundtrack for the big reveal: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtjgdZQS5SI
> 
> I just had to. There was no way I was going to accept the ending of the movie. It was a beautiful film, but I couldn't stand the feels. So, after I'd re-watched the film for about the fifth or sixth time, I had to get this idea out.
> 
> Also, I just had to include a Dummy cameo. No way that wasn't happening, because I absolutely adore Tony's relationships with his bots. 
> 
> And, yes, Samantha's virtual model is based on Scarlett Johansson -- or, if you will, Tony's friend in the Avengers, Natasha Romanov. With some tweaks, of course, otherwise it would just be creepy.
> 
> Last note: I don't actually know when Jarvis (the A.I.) was created in Marvel's comic book canon. So I just guessed. Apologies if it's inaccurate.


End file.
